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I Suck at Brazilian Jiu Jitsu

Today, I was completely and totally thrashed by Captain Caveman (see above).  I was submitted in 50 seconds (of a ten minute sparring session) by a cross collar choke.  I was submitted again, and perhaps a third time.  I can’t remember exactly because when I wasn’t tapping the mat, I had a shoulder in my chin, a knee on my stomach, or I was swallowing hair.  I haven’t been spanked like that in a long, long time.  I oughtweigh CC by a lot, but I couldn't move him at all.  I felt massively frustrated, but I think that was just to mask the instinctual reaction to curl up in the fetal position and rock back and forth.

Most of the time, CC will give me some pointers after the match, but today he withheld comment, perhaps because he didn’t want to give me the advice I really needed, that is, “Stop sucking so much next time.”

In other, completley unrelated news, last week, our lead instructor/owner of the academy, Mandachuva, came back from Brazil with an interesting story.  He only trained a couple of times when he was back at home, including once with his first martial arts instructor, a Judo black belt in Barra De Juca.  Mandachuva went for a kimura from north/south, and wasn’t able to finish it when his opponent grabbed his own gi to defend.  After the match, his instructor reminded him of a move he had learned years ago, but had forgotten.  I guess it would be considered a “forearm slice.”  I don’t ever remember seeing a submission like this, and it’s a pretty cool move when someone defends the kimura...But you have to figure out how to get in top position first, which is a good question to ask someone who doesn't suck at Brazilian Jiu Jitsu.

Update:  I've hit the forearm slice a couple of times, but not against opponent's that really gave a damn about defending it.  (As an aside - I hate when people do not make even a cursory effort to defend a submission before tapping.  Not only are you stunting your own developing as a Brazilian Jiu Jitsu pracitioner, you are stunting mine as well you big jerk.)  I was going against Hoser this evening and as Hoser has a pair of testicles, he was not about to tap when I was only leveraging moderate pain on his forearm.  Afterwards, I asked Mandachuva what I was doing wrong, and he explained to me that while the first step is to shove your arm through the gap, once you post your hand and switch your hips, you need to pull out your arm a little, and then push your ass against your opponent's face.  I was making the mistake of digging my elbow into Hoser's chest, when I should have pulled back a little.  I think I'm going to ask Monstro for some pictures of this because I really dig this move, but I may or may not wear pants (depending upon who my training partner is).